An open letter to the best friends I left in high school

2gri

First off, I’m sorry for a lot of things. Specifically, I’m sorry that I didn’t come to your graduation party. I’m sorry that I didn’t call. And I wish that either of us knew how to handle this, because I’m not sure if it needed to happen this way.

But, I know that it did and I am proud of the woman I have become from learning so much these past few years since we graduated. Yet still—I cannot help but wish things went a bit differently.

I’d like you to know a couple facts about me before you continue on, something that might have been clear, but something neither of us could say out loud in the moment. I don’t know how to have friends. I love the people I have met throughout my life and I know that friendships are possible and amazing and necessary; but it is exponentially easier for me to spend time alone than it is to be around others. This wasn’t true then, but it is now.

Another thing. I didn’t know that you actually cared. In fact, I understood your “letting me go to figure out the world for myself” as an act of negligence and lack of care. I couldn’t understand that you wanted the best for me because honestly, I had no idea what was good for me at the time anyway. READ MORE…

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